I've been thinking a lot lately about how many people I know that have struggled with pregnancy. 

It's A LOT!

It's something that I'm hyper aware of.   What is interesting to me is that I know a large group of good couples that don't struggle to get pregnant with their first child, but have a hard time with their second or third. I have reflected on why so many good people have to wait to welcome children into their families when they have so much to offer as parents.

Many times I have felt like Hannah in the Old Testament.  Wanting a child so badly and being willing to offer the Lord anything in return.  And then I wonder.  Is that why so many good people struggle to have children?  Does the Lord want them to not just be good parents, but to commit to be the best parents?  We ARE in the last days and the Lord DOES need strong saints to lead his work.  Just about everyone I know that has a struggle to welcome children into their home (whether its getting pregnant or adopting. whether they wait 3 months or 18 years) has eventually been blessed with a child.  And then I remember Abraham and Sara. 

The Lord is aware of us.  He needs us to draw close to him and discover what he wants us to learn, and then TRUST him.

Sacrifice of Women

My mom sent me the link to this article from Mormon Times the other day. I especially loved the second half of the article. I know that whatever is the Lord's plan for us He sees our sacrifices and will bless us for them, whether in this life or the next.

"A year later, I had a miscarriage. My first. In the aftermath I grappled with many difficult feelings— grief, anger, longing. Sure, I had only been pregnant for a few weeks, but I had already invested great physical, emotional and spiritual energy in this new life and for what?

A few weeks later, I spoke with a close friend of mine who had just suffered her second miscarriage. I confided my sense of emptiness and futility. But as I continued to speak, I heard surprising words coming from my mouth.

"It wasn't a waste," I said. "It wasn't a waste."

I wasn't quite sure what I meant. But I knew that somehow, my loss counted. It was known by God and would, in some inexplicable way, contribute to his work and his glory, as well as my personal holiness.

I felt better after that, even though it still took more time to recover, both physically and emotionally. I became convinced that when women offer their bodies as vehicles for new life, they are consecrating themselves to God's purposes, and God honors this offering, whether or not it results in live birth.

I realized that this is true for women in a variety of circumstances: women who try and try, but are unable to conceive; women who face the rigors of adopting a child; women who remain single in this lifetime, who must forego maternity as well as intimacy on a number of levels.

I came to this conclusion. Every woman of faith consecrates her body as a living sacrifice. Whether our particular burden is fullness or emptiness, each of us is pushing against the world's current with our eyes on the kingdom of God."